I recently felt an immense amount of jealousy, it was sparked by one particular person, I felt it months ago and did my best to ignore it. What we resist persists, so every time I saw an update from this person I was reminded of the feeling of jealousy that I associated with her. This week the feeling was so uncomfortable that I decided to finally confront it - I spent time contemplating why I felt jealous, I haven’t felt this emotion in years, I know that I can have whatever I want in this life, so what was triggering this emotion, what was the real trigger associated with this person? Did I really want the lifestyle that she is living? Did it feel true for my own path and my own soul values? Was there something underlying that I couldn’t see clearly, what was the real trigger bringing up this emotion in me?
I dug quite a bit, I asked for guidance, but first of all I had to let go of all judgement against myself for feeling jealous, I completely surrendered to it, admitted to myself that I felt jealous, recognised that I did not like the feeling, it felt horrible, and asked myself why I was feeling so jealous?
After some time I finally got that fantastic bomb of clarity! It wasn’t that I was jealous of her exactly, I was jealous of what she had achieved, and I real-eyes that I felt upset with myself for not being disciplined enough to action my own ideas for work that inspires me, I felt like I constantly have been attending to other people’s needs, distracting myself with social events (well worth it sometimes, but needing balance in this moment). I have had a strong desire to build on work that is currently inspiring me, however I was not enforcing enough discipline to action and complete much of this work. I further realised that I was avoiding actioning this work because I felt afraid of the unknown, and also had quite a bit of self doubt lingering that had me constantly questioning if what I was desiring to create was actually authentic and of any value to others.
Clarity bombs like this are so powerful, so worth the time spent in contemplation! With that clarity I have now been able to action the change I needed to action, I have been able to remind myself that I am worthy, that my gifts are of value, I have spent more time meditating to connect with my inner guidance system and more time listening for directions from my Higher self/spirit guides. Simultaneously the jealous feeling has shed itself like an old snake skin - I have been left feeling renewed, inspired, and very clear of my current path and inner desires! I feel that wonderful rush of inspiration to action my desire for work that is meaningful to me, and I know as I stay strong on my path, Universal energies will come into play to help support me - this is the kind of magic I LOVE experiencing. I have already witnessed a sign of support, we had our first air bnb guest book in, and she booked for an entire week!
There is nothing someone else has that we cannot have, and there is not one person who has come into this life without obstacles to overcome. Whenever we feel jealous of someone, I have found it to be of upmost importance to first check in and see if what they have is truly what you desire, maybe it looks nice from the outside, but if you have your own booming business, would you be happy to commit the majority of your time to it or are you happy having a balance of time to yourself in this moment? If someone has been handed a bunch of money to do with what they like, would that bring you pleasure, or do you think you feel more fulfilled working out what works brings you both joy AND rewards you with the energy of money? No one has life completely worked out, as we continue to change and evolve on a daily basis, as do our desires, that is the nature of being human, we constantly reach for more - the art is in knowing what we value and when to appreciate what we have, take time to rest before venturing on our path of expansion further.
Secondly, whenever we feel jealous of someone else, our best tool is to transmute the emotion into inspiration, use the jealously as fuel to go and get whatever it is you desire, for yourself. Don’t waste time telling yourself, they have it easier than you, they do not, everything in this life, fueled by energy is relative, you have everything that you need, and if you don’t, call it in, ask for it - but make sure it is truly what you desire as the exchange will cost you something, absolutely nothing is for free, we are constantly exchanging.